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Delusions of Grimpeur 9 – The Soggy Grimpeur


Quick reminder – my Rapha/High5 competition, running in Delusions of Grimpeur 8, ended at 5pm Monday. I’ll have a look through and post the winners on the related forum thread. Thanks.

This morning I woke up to drizzle. A great deal of it. And fog. And mist (if youre a wannabe meteorologist, please do save me a great deal of embarrassment and refrain from explaining to me the differences between fog and mist and such and if I’ve used the terms incorrectly).  And my face dropped. My soul plummeted. My spirits fell.

Inclement weather is a frustration far beyond the mere fact that you may experience slightly more discomfort than on a regular dry ride. Because, you see, inclement weather brings with it not only dampened spirits, the possibility of cold extremities, and extra soggy Lycra; it also addresses the all-important clothing choices to be made.

Yes, I’m talking about getting dressed; and endless pre-ride faffing with the myriad technicolours of your collected cycling wardrobe. The desperate yet ultimately fruitful foray for the single solitary missing glove liner, before bearing it aloft in sweet sartorial satisfaction (it was hidden behind the tub of energy drink).

It’s an intriguing snippet of history that the original energy gels for cycling were developed to provide a relatively steady fuel source to sustain you through the astronomical amount of time it takes to get dressed for winter cycling. Intriguing mainly because I’ve just made it up. But the fact remains- whether it’s the search for missing items, the head-scratching involved in deciding what combination to don, or the simple act of actually clothing oneself in said sartorial splendour- it takes a long time to get dressed.

I don’t know about you but I long for the coming days where my pre-ride dressing procedure involves nothing more strenuous than the slipping of some Rapha legwarmers on under the bibshorts.

But don’t dismiss bad weather as the perfect excuse to chin off whatever training you had vaguely considered accomplishing that day. If you’re considering skipping the session- chances are others are too. So don’t let your riding mates down by being a wet blanket and staying dry – show some solidarity. A bit of cheer and camaraderie will do wonders for the morale. And if you ride alone or were planning to do so- consider the opposition. Chances are they may be struggling in the throes of a ‘do/don’t I?’ dilemma. If you both ride, the competition status quo is maintained, and you just hope you used your time more wisely than they did. If they don’t ride and you do, well… advantage you.

Wet weather is the perfect opportunity to focus on techniques that at other times you may be too busy to focus on. Handling in the wet, cornering at different speeds, pedal drills. As a thread on the forum will testify, you don’t need to spend loads of time riding a bike to be good- you just need to focus your efforts on specific objectives. Even if you don’t know what you need to improve, or even how to improve it, sometimes a wet ride is just really good for proving your mettle. Anyone can ride in nice weather- it’s a fantastically good time all round. But riding alone in wet weather will really prove to others (and far more importantly, yourself) whether you’re in it for the right reasons. Of my favourite rides/races, at least 80% have been in bad weather. They’re far more memorable, and the ensuing feelings of achievement give much more satisfaction.

So at the risk of teaching you to suck eggs, remember a few simple rules: Layer your clothing, to take items off and on as required. Too hot is often better than too cold. Keep your core warm and there’s far more chance of the extremities having a good blood flow. Pay special attention to any changes in nutritional requirements. Avoid where possible man-hole covers, any other metal on the road, and painted road-markings. Minimise loose clothing- it can get caught or impede handling. Keep the rubber side down. And finally- It’s only water.

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